Today was the first grade awards ceremony at my son's elementary school. Every child walked across the stage with a backdrop detailing his or her self-described greatest accomplishment this school year as well as a list of all the awards he or she earned for scholarship and character. Many children were proud of their math scores, reading levels, and sports prowess. Their accolades included certificates for the “Great Gator” award and “iStation” award. Every child marched across the stage into the warm embrace of his or her teacher and accepted a packet filled with tokens of their triumphs.
My son, Town Hancock, didn’t get an award. He made appropriate gains in his studies. His behavior was acceptable. However, he did nothing academically exceptional this school year. He is amazingly, perfectly, wonderfully "average"… and that’s okay.
In fact, it’s more than okay. It’s magnificent! My boy is right on track. I’m glad that his school honored his growth but didn't over-indulge him with accolades for doing exactly what he was supposed to do in first grade. I’m glad that they praised actual effort and celebrated hard-earned results. I’m glad that his teachers didn’t commend him for simply doing the right thing *most* of the time.
Town didn’t get an award, but he was downright jubilant when his name was called. You see, his teachers gave him a way to claim and publicly celebrate something for which he is truly proud.
My son walked across the stage to accept his reading certificate while the screen displayed the quote he provided on his greatest perceived success of the school year. Despite getting limited time with digital devices at home, Town said:
“I am most proud of finding diamond ore in Minecraft.”
Bold choice considering some of the other children's celebrations...
Towner understands he has a lot to learn, but he’s comfortable in his own skin. For a boy with one ear… For a child who struggles to sit still… For a kid who never thinks twice about telling the joke, making the face, or letting one rip… For an individual whose stubbornness rivals only that of his mother… Odds are, school will be a struggle and his self-assuredness will suffer.
However, Town beat the odds in first grade. He bet seventeen against the dealer, certain of his cards, and he won. He may not have had the highest iStation score, the best marks in math, or even the rosiest behavior chart, but our boy won. He won because, in addition to teaching core content, his teachers allowed him to revel in the miraculous wonderment of childhood imagination. They permitted him to consider his worth on a grander scale and to award himself fittingly.
As parents, we worry about our children. We worry when they aren’t making good grades. We worry when they’re too focused on straight A's. We worry if they don’t have a lot of friends. We worry when we think they might have too many social obligations. We worry that they’re too laid back. We worry that they’re too serious. We worry that their egos will be crushed if they don’t win a prize every time they take a relative risk. Me? I worry too. But, not so much at the moment...
Today, Town Hancock is proud to be Town Hancock. Man, do I ever look up to this boy! He has a lot to teach me about whimsy, resiliency, and confidence.
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